Letting go of hurts and regrets in past relationships is one of the simplest ways to open yourself up to accept Soulmate Love as your destiny and to start magnetizing it in. Simple, but not easy! I remember hanging on energetically to a boyfriend who “did me wrong”- I was still angry for 2 YEARS after we broke up! Yeah sure, I “knew” about how important compassion and forgiveness were, but I just couldn’t seem to let my anger and hurt go.
I was justified in my anger, I felt, and held onto it, until the day came when my Love Coach asked me point blank: “How is this anger and hurt for your ex-boyfriend serving you?”
“Yeah. It’s serving you in some way to hold onto these feelings, otherwise you would have let it go by now. So what is it?” she demanded.
Thank God she had the nerve to ask me that question! By exploring it, I realized that I had been holding on and not forgiving him as a way to protect myself from getting hurt again. My anger and pain was my unconscious barrier to bringing in new possibilities for True Love. By choosing to begin the process (and it was a process) of finding compassion for my ex-boyfriend, forgiveness eventually followed. I met Johnny after this.
Compassion and forgiveness is a path of choice. If there is a person from a past relationship that you have not forgiven, I encourage you to start walking down this path. You are blocking Soulmate Love from you- literally- by holding on.
FORGIVING IN STEPS
(from a Tibetan Love and Forgiveness Meditation)
Allow memories, images and emotions to come up in your mind that you have never forgiven yourself for. Ask yourself: “Can I accept that I am just an ordinary human being with some bad and some good qualities?” Then “Did I not suffer enough from these actions? – I have learned and grown, and I am ready to open my heart to myself.”
“I forgive myself for whatever I did, intentional or unintentional. May I be happy, free of confusion, understand myself and the world. May I help others to be happy, free of confusion and understanding.”
Now imagine yourself in front a person you love (or have loved) and want to forgive. Ask yourself: “Can I accept this person as a human being with bad and good qualities?” – When ready, say:
“From my heart, I forgive you for whatever you did, intentional or not. May you be happy, free of confusion and understand yourself and the world. Please forgive me for whatever I did to you, intentional or unintentional. May we open our hearts and minds to meet in love and understanding.”
Try to feel the warmth of the healing between you.
May the peace that surpasses all human understanding be yours!
By Dr. Lara Fernandez